She tried to poke my eye out!!!

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful sexy eye that lived in my left socket. Then along came an evil cat, named Kitty, who tried to remove it with her claw. I hate Kitty. I still have my eye, but I’m blind. Did I mention that I hate Kitty?

Anyway, my pet human is really mad at her. She makes sure the two of us are never outside at the same time and if we are, evil Kitty has to be in the big dog cage. If I'm inside, she has to be out. I like it this way. muuhahahahaaa....

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Cat Fighting: Why does it happen? by Jeff the Slugger Cat

Cat fighting...a cat that doesn't fight is like Tiger the Sissy.  They sleep all day, run when you attack and spend their time begging for canned food and whine when you slap them on the back of the head sending their furry face smack into the lumpy goo.

Real cats fight!  Why?  Because we have claws!  Because humans don't and can't defend themselves!  Because dogs flee at the sound of our war cries and howl at the feel of our dagger-like claws ripping through their flesh - blood spurting in all directions....

STOP IT!!! STOP IT!!!! STUPID HUMAN!!! I'M WRITING THE INTRO TO MY NOVEL FOR NANOWRIMO!!!! IT'S NOT FAIR!!!! THIS NEVER HAPPENS TO STEVEN KING!!!

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